Why People Can Not Move On

Although one can have the desire to be with someone, they may find that they unable to take the next step. What this is likely to show, is that they are experiencing inner conflict.

And until the part of them that wants to start a relationship is stronger than the part of them that doesn’t, their life is unlikely to change. It is then going to be important for them to take a closer look into what is taking place.

The Hurdle

This could be a time where one will come to see that they are unsure as to whether another person would want to be with them. One could find it hard to believe that they have anything to offer in a relationship.

Thus, if they were to meet someone, it wound only be a matter of time before they realise this. It would then be necessary for them to put on an act in order to keep someone around.


As a result of this, it is not going to be possible for them to move forward, and this could carry on for quite some time. Yet, if one is unable to take a step back from what is taking place within them, this is to be expected.

Now, there is always the chance that they will end up meeting someone and go along with it. They could find that they start to see themselves differently, and this experience is then going to be very healing.

Another Outcome

At the same time, it might not be long until the other person begins to treat them badly, and this is then going to validate how they see themselves. The relationship can begin to crumble and they might soon be back where they were.

Or, one could end up putting up with what is taking place, and they will end up feeling even worse. But if one doesn’t value themselves, there is going to be no reason for them to walk away.

It’s Comfortable

For example, if one had just been sitting by a fire and they were to go out into the snow, they would instantly feel the difference. This comes down to the fact that where they were was very hot and where they went was very cold.

In the same way, if one treats themselves badly, being treated badly by someone else is not going to be any different. This is not going to be something that gives them the urge to get away.

A Different Dynamic

This is then going to be no different to what would happen if one treated themselves well and ended up with someone who treated them badly. Being treated in this way would cause them to feel uncomfortable, and they would soon walk away.

If other people were to hear about this, they might say that this is how someone should behave. And if they were to come into contact with someone who stays in a relationship that is abusive, they could find it hard to understand what is going on.

Caught Up

On the other hand, one might not want to start a new relationship due to what they have recently been through. What this can show is that they have been through a breakup, and this has caused them to experience a lot of pain.

As while they are no longer with the other person, they might find it hard to stop thinking about them. Through being this way, they are naturally going to need to take a bit of time to settle down.


Part of them may want to find someone else to be with, but it could be said that it will be in their best interest to take a break. Once they are on their feet again, they will be ready to meet someone else.

And as to how long this will take can all depend on how they feel; there is not going to be a set time here. One could also find that they meet someone before they feel ready, and it will be down to them to decide if they should go along with it.

Too Soon

If they were to start a relationship even though they are not ready, they could end up using the other person. Having them in their life is then going to be a way for them to avoid how they feel.

Physically they will be with this person, but their mind and heart can be with the person they were with. Out of their desire to run away from their own pain; they will inflict pain onto someone else.

Further Back

But while they one could be still be attached to someone they were with a short while ago, it could relate to someone they were with many years ago. And this could be the very first person they were with.

When this took place, they could have been a teenager or in their early twenties, for instance. And if this wasn’t the first person they were with, it could be the first relationship that had a big impact on them.

Stuck In The Past

Perhaps the relationships they had before this didn’t last for very long, or just didn’t pull them in in the same way. Therefore, while one could be caught up with their first love, it might be more accurate to say that is was their second or third love.

A number of years may have passed since this took place and, while they may have been with people since then, they might have stayed single. There is also the chance that they are currently in a relationship.


On one hand, one could look back on when they were with them and think about how great it was. It is then going to be more or less irrelevant as too how many years have passed since they were together.

But on the other hand, one could find that even though they still experience a strong emotional reaction when they think back, they might wonder why this is. Based on what they have been through since (or even if they haven’t had a lot of experiences), they might see that it wasn’t even that good.

The First Love

From a rational perspective, there is going to be no reason for them to be so caught up with what took place. Yet, when it comes to how they feel about the past, it will be as if this was unlike anything else.

One way of looking at this would be to say that the reason it had such a big effect on them is because it was the first of its kind, so to speak. It is then not necessarily about who they were with or what happened; it’s due to the fact that it was the first time they met someone who they got attached to.


When one looks back, they can end up having an idealised view of what took place, as opposed to being able to see that it wasn’t perfect. Before this happened, they wouldn’t have had these experiences before, and person they were with would have been the person who they shared them with for the first time.

It could be said that it is not necessary for one to completely forget about their first love to be able to move on; they only need to get to a certain point. The Assistance of a therapist might be needed here.


Why You Do Not Find Love

The search for love is a universal one. Yet, when it is found, it is soon replaced with problems, such as the reality of the other person, our own issues or the interference of other people and life. If there is not outward conflict then there is usually conflict within ourselves. To follow the search for personal love is unsatisfactory, yet, to reject the search is more unsatisfactory. Relationships are, generally, the most meaningful and powerful learning experience we tend to have in life.

Search Party

The quest for love is not wrong. However, who we are putting in command of the search party is flawed. Given no other apparent guide, we put our ego in charge of the mission. That’s like putting a young child in charge of the household. He or she will oscillate between being a demanding tyrant and being overwhelmed with irrational terror. The ego asserts that it desperately wants love. Yet, it is structurally incapable of accepting it. It cannot thrive or even survive long-term in the presence of real love. Should we trust that it is going to lead us to the very thing that will destroy it? When the ego is our commander-in-chief, it will work against finding and aligning with love. Although it will claim that it is diligently seeking love, it is doing the opposite. Whenever it is in the territory of real love, it gets nervous and defensive and soon goes AWOL or defects to another team.

The companion we choose before choosing our human companions is what will determine the outcome. We choose either the ego or spirit as our initial companion. Both will be campaigning for our vote. The ego uses every trick it knows. It seduces with talk of our deservedness. Then it ignites our fear that we are actually worthless and should do all we can to hide this fact. It is the mother of all liars and will try and terrify us into accepting its guidance. Spiritual love and the ego are not compatible mates. If one is winning, the other will be losing. There are irreconcilable differences.

The Presence of Love

We don’t know what love is and so we, often, mistake it for something else and we cannot see when it is actually present. We hope, somehow, to get it from someone else. That doesn’t work. Love cannot be possessed, manipulated, threatened or tricked. It will not bow before anything which destroys the spirit. It waits for the quiet moments when the ego has finished talking, demanding, complaining, and scaring. It tries to reassure us that it can be trusted and that it truly has our best interest at heart. It tells us that even if we reject or insult it, it will not be offended. When love is present, the conflict within our being lessens. There is an assurance inside us which is invulnerable to the ego’s constant, defeating propaganda. The more space love is given, the less power the ego is allowed. We find that the ego is simply not needed in the same way anymore


Tips To Make Surprise During Valentine Day

Valentine Day is just around the corner. Men are very bad at giving surprises and this is reason that the day of romance leaves many men in the eyes of the storm. Every girl expects surprises from their partner on these special occasion. Modern women avoid expressing the cliche expectations and men fails to understand. However, you won’t find a girl who would not love to be treated in a special way on the auspicious occasion.

The write-up can be useful for all the men around who has not started preparing for the day yet. The article has compiled some of the quick tips to surprise your girl, this year. Have a look at them.

Organize a dinner date for her

Taking the girl to her favorite restaurant for a candle night dinner is a good idea, but you need to think differently this time. The best dinner for a woman is when the man cooks for her. So, instead of going out, stay at home. Spend some quality time together. Cook her favorite cuisine and bake a cake. Decorate the dinning table with flowers and candles. This will definitely make her day. Ladies generally find happiness in these small gestures.

Take her for a holiday

Valentine is on Tuesday this year. So, you can conveniently plan an extended weekend trip for her. Ask her to take a couple of days leave, but don’t reveal the plan. Keep it a secret and take her to the place that she has been planning to visit. Hill stations or sea side towns are the best places to spend the day. Avoid going to places that are crowded. Choose a quite venue where you get maximum time to spend with each other.

Take her out for a surprise date

In the days leading up to Valentine’s day, try to pretend like you have totally forgotten it. She will try her best to remind you, but you need to avoid it. Call her up at midnight and wish her. Then, take her for out the following day. Get dressed up in your best attire and impress her. Try to wear the shirt that she likes the most. Make yourself presentable in proper formals. You can even the exotic styles of men’s G-string underwear. This will add an extra flare of glamour to your date plans.
Spend the day in retro style

There is nothing as special as the vintage romance style. Organize a party for your girl and invite all her friends and loved ones. The retro theme is ideal for the get-together. The color code of black of the guys and red for girls is a perfect way to make the day memorable for the years to come. Get dressed in retro tuxedo. However, you can trigger your wild on the romantic evening by wearing men’s sheer underwear. Kneel down and propose her in front of every one. Present her with a bouquet of roses as well as Valentine card. This gesture of yours will give her the surprise of life.

Special treatment during Valentine week

You can give a special gift on the various days of the Valentine week. For instance, you can send flowers at her workplace. Give her hand made chocolates on the Chocolate Day. Similarly, you can plan out various activities to surprise her on the different days of the week. Amaze her everyday with your love confession and make the entire week memorable.

You plan one day for her and she will think of you glowingly for the entire month and year. However, before planning anything, make sure that you keep the nature of the girl into account. Keep a note of what she likes and then set the action plan of the day.


All About Valentine Day Card

Valentines Day Cards are a great way of maintaining your love relationship with your lover. Did you know that? Have you ever thought of giving a card to your sweetheart on the day of romance, every 14th February? By the way, do you recognize this Valentine’s Day? Is it really necessary to celebrate it?

Well, in Uganda, it’s not so long since people started celebrating Valentine’s Day as a day for lovers. It all started slowly with a few people in Kampala. At that time, people had mixed feelings about it. While some modern Ugandans welcomed it with open hearts, the majority saw it as a foreign practice that was only imported to destroy the Ugandan culture.

Destroying the Ugandan culture, true? Probably yes, they were right in one way at that time because in some of our cultures, love is implicitly exhibited. Most people shy away from showing their love publicly. The only public occasions people show love are introductions and weddings. When they see others romancing, they consider them to be spoiled. And Valentine’s Day is a day for romance, showing love to your lover.

But as time went on, more people got involved in celebrating Valentine’s Day. It’s much more noticeable and popular in urban places. However, in the rural setting, most Ugandans are still hesitant to embrace it fully. Those, who celebrate it, exchange gifts like flowers (red roses) and wear red and black clothes to show love for their sweethearts.

Although the history of the Valentine’s Day is mysterious, the intentions of celebrating this day are good. And I feel people should embrace it. From the Christian point of view, love strengthens our conjugal life and builds strong families, hence good societies. We make our Valentines Day Cards with personalized special messages for lovers that intend to strengthen their love.

The Catholic Church recognizes Valentine’s Day. Yes, it’s true. St. Valentine was a priest during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, Valentine saw some injustice to young men. He therefore defied the law and went ahead to perform marriages for young lovers secretly. When Claudius discovered it, he ordered for his death. That’s how he became a romantic figure and above all, a Saint.

Why should you use Laser-cut Valentines Day Cards to show Affection to your Lover?

#1: They make the occasion valuable
First, love is a valuable asset God gave to human beings. Without love, couples can never enjoy happy relationships in their life. Love strengthens our conjugal life. This is why we need to consider it important. And laser-cut Valentines Day Cards are suitable for showing your love for him or her because of their high perceived value. Besides, it takes a deep thought and time to come up with a beautiful personalized card for the occasion.

#2: They are the best and affordable way to show your love
Though there are several other ways of expressing your affection to someone, such as writing a letter, laser-cut Valentines Day Cards are one of the best modern ways of doing it. It’s relatively cheaper to express your emotions using these cards. Just customize your card with the messages that bring out all your love feelings. One simple card will play a very big role in strengthening your love.

#3: They are made with a lot of creativity
Thirdly, card makers produce every card with a creative mind. But through creativity, one is able to craft for our clients unique cards with the designs of your choice. You can have awesome designs suitable for husband, wife, fiancé / fiancée, boyfriend or girlfriend created.

#4: Engraved messages look unique and attractive
Lastly but not least, all the messages written on the cards are engraved. This is different from printing them with a digital printer, which is the common practice on many other cards. Engraving makes the cards look different and appealing to everyone.

Laser-cut Valentines Day Cards are a great way of showing your love to your sweetheart on 14th February. Express your affection to your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend and fiancé / fiancée by giving them a valuable laser-cut card.