What Happened When They Love You

The magic words most ladies want to hear, I love you, you know I love you, and Girl I love you. Well those words may land in your heart or in your stomach depending upon who is saying this and where the relationship has gone are is going. I recall hearing I love you from my now ex-husband as he would leave to go to the Crack house, I would hear I love you as I had to hide my keys in my shoe boxes because I knew he would not look there and if he got the keys I would not be able to get to work.

I heard I love you when I went to the mail box and saw a letter from the courts saying he needed to pay child support for the first child he had while we was married. And yes I said the first child there were more L. I heard I love you as I would remind him if he loved us (our 3 kids and I) he would stop doing those things that made us sad, worried and disappointed.

So l had to start asking him are you really in love?, because love should

All About Simplicity Love

Love is the only note that will hang in eternity after all the songs have been sung. It is a fruit that yields a gentle crop. It is a force that acts and moves with breathtaking power.

We cannot change the past. We cannot know the future. Sometimes we cannot even always fill the minutes with the full distance run. Empires may rise and others will fall. Kingdoms, like chess-games, come and go. Yet even as worlds collide, things spin beyond our ken, love is still ours to give.

It is always our determination to be kind even though another response is within reach. It is a decision we make over and over, moment to moment, as we move through the light and shadows of each sunset and dawn.

Love. Simple love. That alone is the treasure that lies within each heart: the power to look past differences, to help instead of harm. To accept, to comfort and to bless. To forgive and hold out compassion even in the face of evil.

People can break your heart, but they can never conquer you if you refuse to hate. They can take away all that you have, but never who you are. Only you have

Greatest Tips For Your Relationship

Read on to find the key principles you should adhere to and that form the cornerstones of the unwritten dating and relationship bible:

1. Have self value

This is the key point because it’s critical to your success with people. If you take on board nothing else in this article – make a mental note of this point!

Most women fail in love for this reason and this reason alone. Women are pre-socialised doormats. We were raised to believe we need to give in order to get but we have been misguided.

The women who are successful in love honor themselves before a man. Such women stand for something knowing that if they didn’t they would fall for anything.

How do you do this exactly you may ask?

  • You establish boundaries. In your mind you develop a list of behaviours or actions that a man may do which you find unacceptable. If you don’t know off the top of your head yet, remember them when they happen. If you don’t know how to judge whether you are being rational or not, simply trust that if something offends or hurts you – it’s not okay and you need to let him know or cut him off completely.
  • Put

All About Random Act of Kindness

A random act of kindness has these three features: it’s to be done now, for no reason, and for no credit.

Jesus is the reason for the season,
Kindness works in every season and region,
Do Random Acts for no reason,
Do your kindness in secret.

God gave us his Son – the grace of which implies such an act of kindness as to resemble what we, from our human viewpoint, could only do as a random act.

For us to replicate the immensity of God’s act of kindness we need it to be random, such that our partialities and prejudices don’t get in the way.

This is understood three ways:

Firstly, we typically hang back on doing kindness. God never did. We find every excuse in the book, at times, to resist giving a kindness. Yet we can all recall a time when we did a good thing without delay, reason or credit and we were incredibly blessed as a result.

To give now is to give in obedience to the Holy Spirit.

Secondly, we do kindnesses, but we do them for a reason, which usually involves a favour returned. How many times have we given something to someone, or done something nice, thinking even subconsciously,

Find The Purpose Of Your Relationship

When you meet someone, it is so easy to see how wonderful they are and see the good in them, which is a wonderful thing. After some time, ‘stuff’ can come up which can make the other person appear to be less wonderful to you. Think about a partner, colleague or friend. We are led to all relationships and all people for a purpose, they are there to help us grow. We are led to the right people who will show us where we were wounded in the past, they will show us what our triggers are and what upsets us. The easy thing to do here is to run away here.

Sometimes we feel that in order for a relationship to work, the other person would need to behave in a particular way for us to be happy. “When they stop being so <fill in the blank>, I will be more loving towards them” or “When they stop being so <fill in the blank>, I will be happier.” However we could also look at this another way. We could use the relationship to heal us and make us a better person.

So if a relationship of mine shows up a lack

How To Get Away From Love In Wrong Places

From our early teens we all have our own idea of what love is; the one thing that is not in conflict is everyone begins searching for it. Is there a method to the madness of chasing something that for many seems elusive? Are you one of those people who always seem to feel you have somehow landed or fallen for the wrong person, leaving you on the hurting end of love? There are some guidelines that do more than make sense.

1) If you don’t want a partner who drinks or parties, don’t go to a bar, nightclub or racy party to meet one. Confine your serious search to workplaces, local gatherings, restaurants and other random opportunities.

2) If cheaters don’t appeal to you, refuse to be involved with anyone who is cheating on someone else to be with you. If you attempt to fool yourself into believing they love you too much to do that, understand that is what their current partner thought. Cheaters cheat.

3) Hate deceitful people? Don’t gloss over untruthful statements your partner is inclined to make. They are not small white lies or offered for entertainment. They are lies. Liars lie. If you find yourself telling your

How To Pick Valentine day Gifts

Oh, you thought I meant his/her happiness? As in making your honey happy with cards and flowers or wearing that sexy lingerie or going to that incredible restaurant? Not! All that’s very nice, however, you being happy is the best Valentine’s Day gift.

Because let’s think about it: what are you like when you’re happy? For one you’re not complaining about every little thing. You’re not seeing problems and hassles everywhere. And you’re certainly not blaming anyone for anything, especially not your honey. And whining? When you’re happy, you’re “fuggetaboutit.”

When you’re happy, you’re a joy to be around. Not only that, you are more appreciative and grateful of your world, your life-and your sweetheart. Because happiness does that. Just like when you’re depressed all you can see around you are more reasons to be depressed, when you’re happy all you can see around you are more reasons to be happy.

When you’re happy, you look at your sweetheart with happy eyes. You see only his/her wonderfulness, those qualities that you fell in love with in the first place. You think about how much you enjoy being together, the deliciousness of your life together. You are naturally more cooperative, affectionate, enthusiastic.

Could anyone ask

How To Build Stronger Relationship

Finding the right person and building a relationship is the topic of the century. More and more people break up, divorce or find themselves lonely and disappointed by their partners.

In my own journey I have tried to understand what have I overlooked. It turned to me that key and most common to a couple’s success is the willingness to invest. Just like you take time to go through education, specialize in your job, learn a foreign language or raise a child, a couple is no different. Requires effort to build it and constant attention and interest for your beloved one. Here is what to look for in broad lines and 3 categories.

Firstly, at the beginning, you need to look for some common grounds related to life in general. Mind for similar level of education and career aspirations, choice of geographical location, desire for long-term relationship or building a family. Same applies for lifestyle expectations, religion and values or sexual compatibility.

Secondly, watch for deal-breakers: vices, infidelity, abuse, immaturity, 3rd party intervention, self and self-worth insecurities, care for appearance and cleanliness. As you dive into the relationship, recheck for point 1 above: religion and upbringing differences, long distance, significant income differences, money

Tips To show Your Love

One most difficult thing to do by any man in a relationship is how to love his woman. However, as difficult as this is so also it is very crucial for the survival of the relationship.

It is important to know that loving your wife is the foundation on which your relationship will stand. And it has been discovered that many men do not know how to show love to their spouses and this has constituted major challenge why many marriages and relationships could not survive.

Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 1Pet.3

Given below are 7 ways to show love to a woman based on the biblical injunctions given by one of the greatest apostles on the earth, Apostle Peter.

7 ways to show love to a woman

1. Be to her a husband

The word husband is from the word husbandry, meaning the care, cultivation and breeding of crops and animals, management and conservation of resources.

The same way the husband as the male in a marital relationship is that man who can care, nurture, manage

Rewards Of Relationship

First and foremost, thank you for taking the time to read this.

What I have discovered that could help many relationships out there is to constantly build my relationships. This isn’t just with my lover although she benefits the most. Because we get to spend so much time together we have found it ever so important to not only relax with each other but to also go on adventures, with and without the kids. We love them ever so much but as a couple we have taken time for just one another, to give each other the kind of love only couples can.

The greatest successes I have seen in other couples is that they are striving to spend as much time together as possible. Life is busy enough without taking time for those that you love most. I urge you the next moment you get to pick up and hug your loved one just stand there for a full minute or two. Do this daily and your relationships with those loved ones will improve dramatically.

Human touch is of great importance. Some people are more sensitive than others. The energies that are exchanged when you are close with another human are quite

All About Obsessive Love Disorder

Love is a wonderful feeling, and the start of a relationship is such an exciting time of getting to know one another, mixed with the feeling of not being able to get enough of each other.

Wanting to spend time together is completely normal, but in a healthy relationship both parties need to be able to function and be happy, without having to be joined at the hip. When you become reliant on the other person for your own happiness, the situation starts to transform from a healthy love – to an obsessive love.

This obsession can present itself in many ways, and sometimes we may not be aware of it straight away.

  • Do you get jealous of your partner spending time with other people, when they could be spending time with you?
  • When you aren’t together, do you feel compelled to know exactly where they are, and who they are with?
  • Are you incapable of being happy or living a functional life when they aren’t around?
  • Have you ever accused your partner of infidelity with no evidence or reason, besides your own insecurity?
  • Do you live in a constant fear that the relationship is going to end?

These are classic feelings of anxiety and insecurity that manifest

Why People Can Not Move On

Although one can have the desire to be with someone, they may find that they unable to take the next step. What this is likely to show, is that they are experiencing inner conflict.

And until the part of them that wants to start a relationship is stronger than the part of them that doesn’t, their life is unlikely to change. It is then going to be important for them to take a closer look into what is taking place.

The Hurdle

This could be a time where one will come to see that they are unsure as to whether another person would want to be with them. One could find it hard to believe that they have anything to offer in a relationship.

Thus, if they were to meet someone, it wound only be a matter of time before they realise this. It would then be necessary for them to put on an act in order to keep someone around.

Stuck

As a result of this, it is not going to be possible for them to move forward, and this could carry on for quite some time. Yet, if one is unable to take a step back from what is taking place within them,

Why You Do Not Find Love

The search for love is a universal one. Yet, when it is found, it is soon replaced with problems, such as the reality of the other person, our own issues or the interference of other people and life. If there is not outward conflict then there is usually conflict within ourselves. To follow the search for personal love is unsatisfactory, yet, to reject the search is more unsatisfactory. Relationships are, generally, the most meaningful and powerful learning experience we tend to have in life.

Search Party

The quest for love is not wrong. However, who we are putting in command of the search party is flawed. Given no other apparent guide, we put our ego in charge of the mission. That’s like putting a young child in charge of the household. He or she will oscillate between being a demanding tyrant and being overwhelmed with irrational terror. The ego asserts that it desperately wants love. Yet, it is structurally incapable of accepting it. It cannot thrive or even survive long-term in the presence of real love. Should we trust that it is going to lead us to the very thing that will destroy it? When the ego is our commander-in-chief, it will

Tips To Make Surprise During Valentine Day

Valentine Day is just around the corner. Men are very bad at giving surprises and this is reason that the day of romance leaves many men in the eyes of the storm. Every girl expects surprises from their partner on these special occasion. Modern women avoid expressing the cliche expectations and men fails to understand. However, you won’t find a girl who would not love to be treated in a special way on the auspicious occasion.

The write-up can be useful for all the men around who has not started preparing for the day yet. The article has compiled some of the quick tips to surprise your girl, this year. Have a look at them.

Organize a dinner date for her

Taking the girl to her favorite restaurant for a candle night dinner is a good idea, but you need to think differently this time. The best dinner for a woman is when the man cooks for her. So, instead of going out, stay at home. Spend some quality time together. Cook her favorite cuisine and bake a cake. Decorate the dinning table with flowers and candles. This will definitely make her day. Ladies generally find happiness in these small gestures.

Take her for

All About Valentine Day Card

Valentines Day Cards are a great way of maintaining your love relationship with your lover. Did you know that? Have you ever thought of giving a card to your sweetheart on the day of romance, every 14th February? By the way, do you recognize this Valentine’s Day? Is it really necessary to celebrate it?

Well, in Uganda, it’s not so long since people started celebrating Valentine’s Day as a day for lovers. It all started slowly with a few people in Kampala. At that time, people had mixed feelings about it. While some modern Ugandans welcomed it with open hearts, the majority saw it as a foreign practice that was only imported to destroy the Ugandan culture.

Destroying the Ugandan culture, true? Probably yes, they were right in one way at that time because in some of our cultures, love is implicitly exhibited. Most people shy away from showing their love publicly. The only public occasions people show love are introductions and weddings. When they see others romancing, they consider them to be spoiled. And Valentine’s Day is a day for romance, showing love to your lover.

But as time went on, more people got involved in celebrating Valentine’s Day. It’s much

Love Will Change Your Life

When I was young I did not have many friends. I had enough friends, just not many of them. For many years, I secretly wished to have more friends, to be more popular, to have more people like me. But that was when I “thought like a child, reasoned like a child” (1 Corinthians 13:11). Fortunately, I grew up. Like the Apostle Paul testified, “I became a man and put childish ways behind me” (IBID).

Not everyone does grow up, you know; some just grow older. Aging is imposed; maturity is a choice. When I became a man – a Christian man at that, I began to actually mature. I began to follow One who called me “friend,” and the path we have walked is one leading to maturity. We are still walking; I am still maturing. I have not arrived! Still, something happened along the way, something of profound importance happened to me.

As profound as it was, I cannot tell you when it happened. I suppose it happened while my eyes were “fixed on Jesus, the author and finisher of my faith” (Hebrews 12:2). Somehow, somewhere, sometime along the way my orientation to life changed. I ceased seeing myself

How To Keep The Relationship

“Marriage isn’t just about raising kids, splitting chores and making love. It can also have a spiritual dimension that has to do with creating an inner life together – a culture rich with rituals, and an appreciation for your roles and goals that link you…” Gottman, 7 Principals of Making a Marriage Work

There are different elements that help build and support a shared meaning, all of which should be established and then built on over time. Read through each element and answer the questions after each section, making note of any thoughts that pop up you want to share with your lover.

Four Elements that Build a Shared Meaning and Purpose

Tip 1. Rituals of Connection
Tip 2. Shared Views
Tip 3. Shared Goals and Dreams
Tip 4. Shared Values

Tip 1. Rituals of Connection:

A ritual of connection refers to the small things you do as a couple or a family which build and strengthen the emotional and spiritual connections between you all.

Ask yourself these questions:
• How do you and your partner connect with each other?
• Have you developed your own family rituals?
This could be a special meal on the weekend such as a takeaway on a Saturday or

Why True Love Endures

Memory carries a lot of heartaches, disappointments and broken promises of which we could hardly let go. Sometimes we are the enemy of our own selves. We want to forget but war arises between our minds and our hearts. It is a struggle to survive day by day forgetting the pain. The more we push away the person who hurt us, the more we will be deeply wounded inside.

We give up but the gravity inside us pulls back that loving feeling. We tend to escape from reality giving ourselves the false hope. But in the morning when we wake up the pain is still there killing us like a double-bladed sword squeezing our hearts up to the last drop of blood.

At night, our beds feel like graveyards where darkness swallow us while we are lying to sleep. The silence of the night is deafening, no music to be heard but only the howling noise of broken heart like wolves waiting to devour us. We looked unblemished but perfectly dying to death.

Painful as it can be, we strive hard to let go. No matter how it hurts, we choose to forget. We force ourselves to find a new love, someone

Common Mistake During Marriage Proposal

It was Dan and Anastasia’s time. It was a gift from life or, perhaps, it was life’s little joke to itself. Yet, neither of them could bring themselves to laugh. It was too important and too promising.

It did not take long for Dan to turn to Ana one day, take her hand, and say, “If I asked you to marry me, would you say yes?” Ana was surprised. Such a serious question. Daniel’s eyes would not let hers turn away. They were tunnelling with the demand, Answer me, now.

Before her mind could manage to push forth some reasonable concerns, even objections, a smile jumped into the arena and smoothed itself over Ana’s mouth. The deal was sealed in the passing of a few seconds. For the shortest breathing space, Dan and Ana relaxed, as if before the storm. The moment was so piercingly innocent that both felt naked and embarrassed like too much of themselves had been shown to the other. Now, it was too late to take it back. Purity has its own power; not to be messed with.

In retrospect, the signs were clear but Ana didn’t want to believe them. From that purest of moments, the devil was

Why You Need To Love Yourself

Growing up, most of us had numerous experiences of being blamed. I was frequently blamed for things that I was too young to understand, or for things that I didn’t do ‘right’, or for things that, to me, didn’t seem worthy of blame.

Being blamed feels awful, and I learned to feel guilty even when I hadn’t actually done anything wrong. Looking back, I now understand that blaming and judging myself, which caused me to feel guilty, felt better and more empowering than feeling the depth of helplessness over being so unseen, unheard and misunderstood.

Today, I work with many clients who are very reactive to being blamed. They often get angry or defensive, rather than feeling the helplessness and heartbreak of being unseen, unheard and misunderstood. Of course, this creates problems in relationships, since their partner then also feels unseen and unheard at the other end of the anger and defensiveness.

Blame vs. Responsibility

One of the underlying issues is that there is often confusion between responsibility and blame.

What would happen in conflicts if partners and families accepted that everyone is responsible for their own behavior and choices, but that no one is actually to blame? What if we each chose to